And now, a few minutes with CAPTAIN OBVIOUS, the superhero whose amazing power is the ability to point out what everyone else already knows.

Yesterday was the annual festival known as Super Bowl Sunday, when Americans of all sizes, shapes, and opinions gather to overeat and watch heavily padded men bash each other in the brief interludes between commercials. The Captain will refrain from making less obvious points and merely mention that several of our gladiators had to leave the game with injuries of various severity. The truth is, if you play football for any length of time you're guaranteed future health issues. The lives of these men are being cut short for present day riches and for our amusement.

Once again, sponsors paid exorbitant amounts of money for snippets of airtime to hawk their wares. Commercials were of different quality. One ad, I think it was for Audi, was so obscure that Captain Obvious was left completely flummoxed and with absolutely no urge to buy a car.

The Captain reminds everyone that many of the commercials were meant to sell beer. The trouble is, all the beer consumed yesterday had already been bought by the time the commercials appeared! So the beer companies were appealing to a large audience of people who were already drunk, and whose powers of retention were probably about on the level of inanimate objects.

The Black-Eyed Peas appeared at halftime and performed non-melodic songs with lyrics that were incomprehensible to the Captain. When he mentioned his mystification out loud, Mrs. Captain reminded him that his own elders probably felt the same way about the beloved bands of his younger years. "Ob-la-di, ob-la-da, life goes on, babe, bra-la-la how life goes on."